40 Under 40

I blog a lot about Jake and what a great guy he is, you are probably sick of it by now, but his most recent achievement deserves a shout out. Drum roll...

Jake is one of Pittsburgh Magazine's 2012 40 under 40!

So what does that mean exactly? Pittsburgh Magazine gets 100's of nominations from all over the Pittsburgh region and they narrow it down to 40 leaders that posses energy and drive to effect positive changes around town. Check it out here!

On a daily basis Jake enters the lives of children, for a not-so-good reason. He instantly becomes part of their family, even if they don't need another family member - they have no choice by the time they meet him. Without getting into details and depressing all of you Jake pours every bit of his being into the role he plays in their lives.

I know first hand how hard he takes certain situations, how frustrated he gets, how many nights he doesn't sleep, how many nights I don't sleep due to 24/7 pages, how pumped he gets to see someone after 3 years in remission, and his excitement talking about how a kiddo loved his batman bow tie.
The good, the bad and the ugly, he tackles it all - with more grace than I even knew existed.

When I first meet Jake I thought "I will cry every day, there is no way I can date him, how can I live my life with a black cloud over my head every day?" I soon realized it should have nothing to do with my feelings, I'm not the one actually dealing with this. That was nothing but a selfish thought on my part. More importantly, I should think about the families and how they deal with one of their children having a life threatening disease. I learned this from Jake - not by him telling me but by his actions.

Camp -
Jake has spent parts of the last 8 years volunteering at summer camps for kids with serious illnesses. He got hooked during his residency at the University of Connecticut and has spent summers at camp ever since. After moving to Pittsburgh 6 years ago he started volunteering at Flying Horse Farms, located right outside of Columbus Ohio.  

Some info courtesy of their website:  Flying Horse Farms is a member of the SeriousFun Children’s Network.  Formerly the Association of Hole in the Wall Camps, it is an international family of camps that was founded in 1988 by actor, film director, and Ohio native Paul Newman. In Newman’s words, these camps are meant to give children the chance to “kick back, relax, raise a little hell, and just be kids.”

Jake spends the week at camp as one of the on-site doctor, wearing wigs in talent shows and going by the name 'Jakey Cakes'. This past Spring I had the pleasure of volunteering as a camp counselor at a family weekend camp. I had a blast but, more importantly, the kids just went bonkers and had the time of their lives. Literally, they told me it was the best weekend of their lives. This was not my first experience at a camp of this nature - a few years ago thanks to AE I had the opportunity to travel to California and be a camp counselor at the Ronald McDonald Camp for Good Times. Both experiences opened my eyes to how resilient kids are, how they know and don't know at the same time and how just a few days at camp can raise their spirits for a year.

There are so many people in this world that would not lift a finger for someone else in need, I am thankful for people like Jake and places like Flying Horse Farms.

Dr. Suess week at camp

Cure Rock -

Last May, Jake hosted a concert at Stage AE in Pittsburgh to raise money and awareness for the Adolescent and Young Adult Oncology program at Children's Hospital. 4 local bands - Donora, New Victorians, Color Fleet and Meeting of Important People came out to play and support a good cause. He raised a good amount of money with the help of sponsors and friends. 

The AYA program at the hospital holds a ski trip every year to 7 Springs, meets at Dave and Busters and science-y things like fertility preservation, clinical research, and, um, treating cancer. Obviously, these things are not cheap, so events like Jake's concert really help out.

Jake and my dad, a sponsor.

Jake and his brother Mickey.
Mickey volunteers in a soup kitchen every Monday morning, good group of boys! 

AE girls came out to support

My friend Lisa and I won bing in the silent auction

If there is anyone that deserves to be recognized for doing good in his community, it's Jake. We spent Friday evening celebrating with the other 39 amazing winners. It makes me want to give back more than I currently do. Even though no one did their good works for awards, it was impressive to hear so many stories.  It's refreshing to know young people in town are so motivated to help others.

Halloweenie

This Halloween I have been really down on dressing up, for no reason other than my mind has been totally full of wedding planning and wedding ideas. Sounds crazy but there was just no room for halloween costume creativity this year.

A few other blogs and some texts with my college girlfriends really inspired me to dig up some past Halloween costume photos... and share!

I did decorate at home with a few of my favorite fall trinkets and bought some mums for the front porch but I defiantly did not get into a costume.

Don't worry though, I love a costume, as you can see from the past few years...

pirate and farmer

best halloween, ever

knights

mario and luigi

thing 1 and thing 2

pirate and cruella deville

jake hates costumes

Happy Halloween!

Version 30.0

I have no idea why everyone gets so worked up about turning 30.  Honestly, I feel exactly the same as I did when I turned 27, 28 and 29.  Now 25, that was a complete meltdown, but 30... so ready for it!

I am pretty proud of the direction I have taken myself these last 30 years - very few regrets, have always done good for my community, give my all at work, exercise on a semi-regular basis, eat lots of fruits and veggies, pick friends wisely, no arrests, visit my elders ... certainly far from perfect, but I give it all I got!

What prompted me make all of those positive decisions the past 30 years?  I often think about why people end up the way they do and the only explanation I have for myself is... my parents. I see so many of my qualities in them, that has to be why I am the way I am, right?

I'm sure I have been molded into the person I am today because of many people and events but I really believe my roots at home with my parents is where it all started. Over the past 10 years I have defiantly grown but I have fundamentally been the same person since October 14, 1982.

The last 30 years I have:

Loved -
I have been in love since birth. For years it was with a yellow blanket and stuffed animals, but it was still serious deep love. I have vivid memories of being loved as a child, always knowing how great it is to love and be loved.  I have a group of girls in my life that I love beyond measure, to the point where I tear up thinking about how different my life would be had I not meet them.  And now, this love I have for my future husband... it's vaguely similar to my other loves but on a different level. It's hard to put into words, it's more - the best love you can feel.

Said it - 
If it's on my mind, you know about it.  Right or wrong that's how I am. Why beat around the bush or lie about something - tell it like it is. Everyone else is thinking the same thing, i'm just the nut case that actually says it out loud.  Ok, sometimes I go overboard but I think having a strong voice and opinion is important.  I am much more opinionated than my immediate family but I defiantly know exactly which side of my family I get my strong will and voice from.  I would not change it for anything.

Worked, and worked hard - 
So cliche, but so true.  I have worked in some way shape or form since I was 16 and have been really lucky to not have hated too many of my jobs (there were 1 or 2 I would not wish on anyone), which makes a difference. If you hate your job, you will most likely not succeed.  Over the past 7 years or so I have spent the bulk of my time working hard and loving what I do.  I don't know any different, both of my parents have worked my entire life - that's what you do as an adult, you work and support yourself. Who else will?!  Plus, what is more fulfilling then getting a promotion and being appreciated for your hard work and effort? Ok, probably the birth of your first child or something, but I am not exactly there yet!

Sent a letter -
I stand by the hand written thank you card. Actually, I stand by notes and cards handwritten and sent through the mail. Good old paper mail with stamps, not this Yahoo mail or Facebook message business. There is noting better then opening a real letter or card that has been delivered to your house. I also love to send mail, it makes me happy to pick out paper or a card that someone else would enjoy reading.
I have a huge box of stationary, cards, stickers, address labels, return labels, stamps, paper and envelopes - I'm addicted!  I think my love (or hate at the time) stems from my mom making my brother and I hand write thank you cards for every single birthday gift and Christmas gift from age 5-18. My mom also sent and still sends my brother and I cards in the mail. I have cards and letters from her saved in boxes from when I went to summer camp through college.  It's a dying art but I am going to stick with it until the US Postal Service stops selling me stamps.

Planned - 
Girl loves to plan! I am horrible at a lot of things but this I have down. Organization and planning could be my first and last name. Every aspect of my life is on a To-Do List or has been well thought out in advance. I hate when I miss or forget something, so years ago (or maybe from birth) I decided to write it all down and cross it off when it's done.
Seems simple right?  Wrong. I spend A LOT (maybe too much) of my time just getting stuff organized and planned out, even before I start a task.
Of course this comes from my parents as well, my dad is a planner. He is always writing lists and drawing out plans. He won't start on a project until I draw him a picture, with measurements!
Sometimes I wish I could live day by day and not worry about what is happening 6 months from now. Then I recall every hot mess I have come in contact with that has no clue what is going on and zero plan in place... I may be crazy but at least it's organized chaos.

Not expected anything in return - 
I love to give - anything from a small little package in the mail, a little trinket, flowers or a big birthday gift. I give to make people happy and feel special, not to get a gift in return. I try my best to be thoughtful with birthday and christmas gifts - actually I plan for over a year sometimes. I freak out if I have to get something last minute, there is no thought put into it if I have to run to Macy's and pick up a tie or something. I have a closet full of gifts waiting to be given! Every trip I take I come back with at least 2 or 3 things I saw in my travels that made me think of someone.  I think I get this from my mom too, one of the most generous, selfless people I know. She is always coming over to my house with flowers or something cool she found for me at an estate sale.

Recently, I might have been outdone by Jake -- I cannot seem to top him. How do you top a trip to Disney world for your 30th birthday?! Seriously?!  Dinner reservations every night, a massage - total surprise trip!  You don't, that's why I love him, he expects nothing in return.

Not to be overshadowed by Disney World, I was totally spoiled this year buy lots of people.  Treats, flowers and gifts from my co-workers.  Flowers from my brother, a necklace from my grandparents, gifts in the mail from dear friends, and a future sister in law, the magic bullet blender from the Coopers, lots of gifts from my parents  and cards galore! I was in heaven!

I cannot wait to see what the next 30 years bring.  I hope to grow and I certainly know I will learn a ton more about life and love but what I want the most is to stay exactly the same.

******

A few wedding updates:

- Picked a florist - not even sorry that I am willing to pay more for flowers than my dress.

- Got engagement pictures taken - hoping to post them soon! 

- Booked transportation - yea, there are buses involved.

- Started picking some songs for the DJ - Jake insists on the Notre Dame Fight Song ... I guess I cannot deny him that.

Red, White, and Proud of You

Growing up, I never imagined my brother would choose the military as his career path, but I knew he would not be happy to sit at a desk all day and crunch numbers on a spread sheet.  He's much too active and hands-on for that.  At the same time, though, with the madness that has been happening around the globe, who would choose to insert themselves into that situation!?  Well, lots of people - lots of talented, brave, smart and passionate people.

The day my brother mentioned he was thinking of leaving West Virginia University to join a branch of the service, I knew he was dead serious. It was not one of those times when someone has a big idea and doesn't follow through with it. Us Kmick's are doers - we follow through and get it done. 

A few months of contemplation went by trying to decide what branch best fit him (and what branch would give my parents the lest amount of anxiety). The Air Force required excellent eyesight (which my brother does not have), and, at the time, the Army was a 100% guaranteed trip to Iraq or Afganastan.

After two years at WVU, he was meant for something bigger, something that could show him more of the world. He didn't go back the next semester and enlisted in the United States Navy.

I was a wreck.
I was scared.
I was worried how my parents would handle it.
I was proud.

The amount of courage it took him to make a decision like that DURING A WAR is way beyond the amount of courage I have.

He enlisted for 4 years and started at the Great Lakes Naval base located in Chicago Illinois in December 2008 for basic training.

So, what did I do the few weeks leading up to that?

Shed some tears and told myself to buck up, be strong, and deal with this. Not only did I think of my brother and how he was handling this, but I thought about myself and how I would actually deal with it. How would I feel without seeing my only brother for months at time?  Would I be sad every holiday because he was not there with me to open gifts?   Would I miss him yelling at me for asking questions when we watch movies?  Would I be able to handle my parents seeing him go?  Looking back I had no idea what to expect or what feelings would surface over the next 4 years.

The day to see him off finally came. My mom could not go - she just could not do it. She stayed at home while my dad and I drove him to the Naval recruitment office. He didn't want us to go in so we said our goodbyes in the parking lot. A few hugs, some quick words and we watched him walk off into his future. I'll never forget my dad quietly saying how proud he was of him and the look on his face seeing his son leave. It was one of those times when I realize how lucky I am to have my family. Just the four of us.

The next few months were a blur of letters, packages, and short phone calls every few weeks. Finally, February 2008 and his graduation from basic training allowed us to see him.  He looked great, seemed happy and we were ecstatic to be part of his graduation.

A few more months went by and he was assigned to the USS Abraham Lincoln - an aircraft carrier stationed in Everett, Washington at the time.   It was not far from Seattle but just about as far from Pitsburgh as you can get.

Some facts about his ship (courtesy of Wikipedia):
- USS Abraham Lincoln (CVN-72) is the fifth Nimitz-class supercarrier in the United States Navy. It is the second Navy ship named after former President Abraham Lincoln. Her home port is Norfolk, Virginia, and she is a member of the United States Atlantic Fleet. 
- She is currently the flagship of Carrier Strike Group Nine and host to Carrier Air Wing Two.
- On 1 August 2011, the U.S. Navy announced that the Abraham Lincoln will shift its homeport from Everett, Washington, to Newport News, Virginia, for its Refueling and Complex Overhaul in August 2012. 
- The ship departed Everett for the deployment that would take it around the world to Newport News in December 2011.

In civilian talk, this is a giant ship (364 yards to be exact) with tons of planes and helicopters.  When on active duty, the planes fly 6 days a week to lots of locations but mainly Afghanistan and Iraq. The ship houses around 5,000 soldiers; ranging from cooks, medics, electronic techs, and pilots.  The ship serves more than 20,000 meals a day, gives 250 haircuts a day and washes 5,550lbs of laundry a day.  Her most recent trips include the Persian Gulf, Turkey, Dubai-United Arab Emirates, Thailand, Suez Canal, North Arabian Sea, Bahrain and Kuala Lumpur.

Oh, did I mention he signed for another 2 years?!?  That will be 6 years total and he is still undecided if he will make the Navy is career or leave after 6.

This past August, after finishing his second deployment, he got to spend 3 weeks in Pittsburgh. This was the longest he had been home in over 4 years.  It was awesome to have him home and spend some time with Jake.  They had met the year before, but the most recent deployment has not allowed us to spend much time with him.

After that visit home, Adam moved into his first apartment in Norfolk, Virginia.  He drives to the ship everyday since it is currently decommissioned and being renovated for its next tour of duty.   My parents, Jake, and I took a long weekend to visit him and bring him some furniture (and the various meals I have been cooking and freezing for him the past few months).

The boys in front of the ship

Adam's antenas on the bridge

Adam showing us around

The only way to get from level to level

   

 

Little fuzzy but that was Adam's bed for 8 months

The anchor chain mechanism

He gave us a tour of the ship, which Jake was super excited about. We spent the weekend turning his apartment into a home, eating, shopping and spending the much needed time together as a family.

My little brother has been around the world and back (a few times!), all to protect and serve this country.  Before all this Navy stuff went down, I was not the most patriotic or sentimental person. We all have heard stories of military kids not seeing their dad for a year and couples being separated due to deployments. It's all very sad but you can't fully understand what it's like until it happens in your family. 

I have a new appreciation for the thousands of people in this country who have a loved one in the service. I can't even pass a flag without thinking of Adam and all the sailors on his ship. This experience has really softened me up, or maybe that's just me growing up, either way the past few years have not only changed my brother but they have changed me.

A Bow Tie Birthday

On September 7th Jake turned 35!

For almost a year I have been planning and brainstorming plans for his birthday. It's not 30, and it's not 40, but 35 is a milestone in my eyes! I knew there had to be friends, family, meat and bow ties involved. Some of his favorite things.

Jake wears a tie every single day to work (except for the occasional No-Tie-Tuesday), a far cry form my jeans and t-shirt work attire, so he really embraces the whole business casual thing. I give him credit, he manages to look sharp everyday and never complains about 'being dressed up' while I roll out of the house in jean shorts and a tank top.  He has over 75 long ties and has recently been sporting lots of bow ties. I am all for the bow tie and not so much for the Christmas Rudolph or NYC Taxi ties. However, I cannot and don't complain, he receives ties as gifts from kids all the time and a lot of them are really special to him.

As far as the meat goes, Jake loves a BBQ joint or anything BBQ related. One of the first get togethers we had as a couple was New Years day 2012. Jake ordered some crazy amount of meat from Salt Lick, a BBQ restaurant in Austin Texas that he just dies over. We had some friends and family over and ate loads of pork, sausage, ribs and all the fixin's.

How do you combine barbecued beef, bow ties and a birthday?! Easy...

Friday, his actual birthday, The Cooper Boys drove in from Connecticut. I had already been planning on Union Pig and Chicken for dinner so when the boys decided to come to Pittsburgh I knew that was the right choice. They also love BBQ. Union Pig and Chicken is all around an amazing place. Great vibe, not too big, delicious selection for the meat lover (or the semi meat lover) and good drink selection. I decided on the brisket, cornbread and mac & cheese, of course! Jake and Steve went for the fried chicken... Jake a half and Steve an entire chicken! Mickey and Frank split the 2 meat dinner, ribs and brisket. We all dug in and there was not a complaint in the house. After dinner we went back to Jake's and made ourselves sick on cookies, cheesecake bites and cupcakes. BBQ birthday, check.

This brings us to the party! I like to have a theme and I like to keep parties small. I'll save his 60th to invite the entire town and rent out the local Elks club.  Like I said, I had been brainstorming for quite some time about the menu, decorations, etc. I decided on pulled pork, pulled beef (made by my mom!), baked beans, cheesy potatoes and a bunch of dips and sides. I went to Pinterest for dessert ideas and stumbled upon bow tie sugar cookies, thank you Pinterest! I ordered the cookie cutters months ago and even did a test batch to make sure they looked and tasted ok. As for decorations, I asked Jake's mom for baby and kid pictures and did some bow tie garland. Among other things my time at AE has taught me Adobe InDesign, Photoshop and Illustrator and what better use of my knowledge than to make birthday banners and invitations!

I had prepped pretty well the month or so leading up to birthday week so that allowed time to go to Youngstown Tuesday night and enjoy dinner with some of our best friends and see Hall and Oates at Stage AE on Wednesday night. Jake loves them - Hall, Oates AND Sarah, Natalia, Amanda and Jim!

Some birthday week highlights...

Jake told me it was one of the best Birthdays he has ever had. I love a party and love to give gifts but in the end we love to spend time together. We could have sat at McDonalds, just the two of us, I know he would have been happy and grateful for our time together. That's why I love him, he asked for and expected nothing. That's the thing, when someone puts everyone else first and never thinks of themselves... you want to give them the world.

Happy Birthday Jake. I love you, more than you love 10lbs of pulled pork...

Some wedding updates...

We got some awesome t-shirts from Hot Metal Studio Photography this week and booked our engagement photo shoot for October! 

We got an awesome silhouette from a friend, it's framed and up in the house... my house... our journey to combine houses is for another blog day!